Church #1: I went to a Saturday night service at the first church. It was...very interesting, in both positive and negative ways. I got there about 15 minutes early. One person said hi to me the entire time I was there, and that's because she was behind a welcome desk. They were still trying to set up and get ready for the skit during the service, so that was somewhat awkward and entertaining to watch. There were some sound issues throughout the entire service, and the choices for the worship time were not ones I would usually choose. But, all that being said, I kind of enjoyed the rest of the service. It was a special weekend that they called Infuse, where the children, youth and adult ministries came together in one service. They based it off of Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader and intertwined the makeshift game show with three different mini messages from three different people and wrapped it up with a prayer time. It was geared toward parents and how to encourage them if they feel that they're doing something wrong, that everything's falling apart, or they just feel disconnected from their kids. It also gave information about each ministry and how to get involved in them.
Church #2: I got to go to church with my aunt & uncle Sunday morning. The church has two traditional and two contemporary services each Sunday. My aunt & uncle were nice enough to go with me to the contemporary service even though they usually go to the traditional one. It was very similar to what we do at my home church. There was a praise band that consisted of a few guitars, a keyboard, bass, drums, and a vocalist. I knew a couple of the songs and thought that the overall quality of the music set was great. I did notice that the band kind of lacked in stage presence. It seemed like they were so focused on getting every note or every word right that they forgot to let go and enjoy what they were doing. The sermon was over Titus 2:6-8 and focused on young men becoming Godly examples, and how everyone else was to help them in this journey.
What I got from all this: Disclaimer--this next section might offend some people or hurt some feelings. That is not my intention at all. I just want you to know now that I am not focusing any of these thoughts on one specific person. These are just things I took away from this weekend of reflection. Everything I write about applies to myself as well. I am in no way perfect, nor do I go to a perfect church. I'm hoping these things can be applied to everyone that looks at this, and not solely in the four walls of a church. This part is gonna be a little lengthy, but hang in there with me. Hopefully we can all get something out of this.
- First impressions are vital. We tend to overlook this. We get so comfortable in just walking in, saying hi to people we know, and getting trapped in our own bubbles. I felt so awkward at that first church when no one said hi to me. I sat in a row by myself for the entire service. I saw some people look and me and wonder who I was, but no one took the time or effort to introduce themselves (aside from the welcome time where I turned around and shook hands with three ladies behind me). I am just as bad about this at my church. It's not in me to regularly go up to people I don't know or don't often see and introduce myself or ask how they are or ask if I can do anything for them during their visit. Even the smallest gesture can change a person's outlook on the entire visit. At the second church, people smiled at me, said hello, held doors for me, asked me how I was, etc. One man almost ran over another guy to open the door for me on the way out. It was precious. But anyway, first impressions are super important.
- We're all in this together. If High School Musical just popped into your head, I'm sorry. If the scene where the dad from Modern Family is dancing to that song popped into your head, you're welcome. Anyways, we should all strive to work together. One thing I noticed about the first service I went to was that everyone was involved. It wasn't just a two man show where the worship leader sings and the lead pastor preaches. The children's minister got up and danced with some of the kids during one of the worship songs, and then she gave the first message about how much time parents have with their young ones before they graduate, how to make the most of that time, and how they can be plugged into the church. Another guy helped with the dance and sang, then he played the Cajon for the last song. The creative arts guy gave the second message about today's perceptions on the youth and how to get them plugged into youth activities. The lead pastor opened the service and closed it with a special prayer time geared toward parents. The youth pastor led the game show skit. They were a unified group that came together to make a cohesive service that displayed the different ministries of the church and put a face with each of them. I would love to see my church do something like this; have a service where we have kids, youth and adults participate and bring something. It puts a face to each ministry, forces us to communicate with each other, and come together for the greater good. I have to confess, I get a little disjointed from everything going on in my church. I get so caught up in helping with the worship ministries or the youth that I forget about the children's ministry, the women's ministry, the small groups, etc. I honestly have no idea what goes on with the kids or what Bible studies are being led. I fear that sometimes we all get caught up in our own little areas of service that we forget about the big picture. We forget to talk to other people, work together, communicate, and reach out. I'm glad that we're doing a 40 days of prayer with specific requests for all of our church areas. It helps me remember that I'm part of something bigger than myself in my own little service bubble. As a church, we are the body of Christ. If one part is broken, we are all broken. A broke leg can't mend itself. It has to rely on the other leg to support more weight while it heals. We can't expect to make changes by ourselves. We have to unite with the rest of the body to make the greatest impact.
- Less ideas, more action. This is something that I've been noticing in different areas for quite some time now. And this isn't necessarily just in church; this is life in general. We get all of these awesome ideas and the big, grand visions of something awesome and amazing. We get pumped up talking about it to and with other people. We get people on board with our idea, they get pumped, but then what? I've noticed that we miss out on the practical application. You want to see more people in your Bible study? Great! How are you gonna get them there? You're tired of being a clique and want to reach out to new people? Fantastic! What's the first step to that? You have a passion for a discipleship ministry and want to have everyone in the church in this program? Super! Who are the first people to make this happen? It's almost like we get so focused on the Sunday School "Jesus answers" that we forget about that all important first step of making it happen. I'm exactly the same way. I get that spiritual high of a great idea, but then don't see it through to action. If we want to grow, we've got to stop this. We've got to actually make things happen. Otherwise we're nothing but empty promises. We've got to have practical applications to what we talk about. In both services I went to, they gave simple, every day things for people to do to go along with the message. The children's minister at the first church told the parents to talk to their kids and get them interested in what they're doing and learning at church. How do they do that? The kids go home with two papers each week: one for the parents to look over with questions to ask throughout the week, and one for the kid that has devotionals, memory verses, reminders of what they talked about, etc. The pastor in the second service told young men to live wisely, find models, and build integrity. How? Start by surrounding yourself with mature people and peers who are following Christ. Find someone you respect that can be your mentor and keep you accountable. Practical applications people!
- Get to the source. So we all go to a perfect church that doesn't need any changing, right? HA! You let me know when that exists. If you're like me, you're always seeing things that could be even just a little different. As humans, we can be very pessimistic at times. We focus on all the negative things and forget to see the things that are going right. But the worst part about all of this? We don't actually talk to the person that can fix or change it. We talk to everyone around us about what's wrong or what needs to change except for THE ONE PERSON THAT CAN ACTUALLY DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. I learned in all of my counseling classes in college that if something is bothering you--whether it be at work, school, church, whatever--that you go to the person directly involved with that situation. If nothing happens after that, then seek outside opinions and reinforcements. This goes for both negative and positive situations. You can't stand the perfume your coworker is wearing and it gives you a headache? Don't tell your best friend, ask that coworker to not wear it anymore. That saves you and your best friend a headache! Your kid told you that someone gave them a high five and told them they were awesome? Tell that person thank you and to keep that encouragement going! Otherwise they may not realize that has such a positive impact on people. You don't like the songs being sung on Sundays? Don't tell the people sitting beside you. Talk to your worship leader. Nine times out of ten, they WANT to hear if you enjoyed your worship experience at the church or if you have a specific song request (unless they're a complete jerk and don't care about other opinions :-P). You really enjoyed the prayer time at the end of the service? Tell your pastor so it can be incorporated into more services! You see a specific area for growth? Don't form a little possey and gang up on the person leading that area. Go to them and give your honest opinion. We get so afraid of hurting people's feelings that we talk to everyone but that person, then they find out that people are talking about them, and they get their feelings hurt anyway. I'm just as guilty of doing this. I love a good passive aggressive rant as much as the next person and will tell five different people about something that bugged me on a given occasion, but I won't actually talk to the person that matters and that can change it for next time. But I think we'll get a lot more accomplished if we step up, be honest, and have meaningful one-on-one conversations.
- Go at it with all your heart. Whatever we're doing, we need to give it our all. It's very apparent when we just do enough to get by. We ourselves may not notice if we're doing this. Just like the band in the second service I went to this weekend. Most of the musicians were so focused on the literal music that they were stiff and somewhat disconnected from the actual worship experience. The technical guys in the first service didn't get there as early as they probably should have, so they had sound issues the entire time, which was very distracting to me. I have this problem as well. If I try to pick songs for our Wednesday night youth service two hours before we're supposed to play, it's not near as awesome as it is when I pick the songs a few days before, have time to think about if they go with the theme, if they flow together, etc. We can't just give 60% and hope for the best. We have to have a passion for what we're doing. People notice when we're doing things just because we have to. People notice when we get burnt out even before we notice it ourselves. If you need to take a step back and reevaluate your role, go for it. That's kind of what I did this weekend. I gave myself a chance to just sit and enjoy rather than worry about where I was and what I was doing. But whatever we do, we have to be authentic.
- Remember why we're here. It's not about us. It's never been about us. We are disciples of Christ, the ultimate servant. He came to serve, not to be served. He came to further the kingdom of God, not to lift up himself. This has to be our goal as well. We can't be in this to pull and Anchorman and say "Hey everyone! Come see how awesome I look!" Whatever you do, do it for the glory of God.
